I don’t even want to know the weird conversation and looks when the host started yawning at dinner, the accepted sign of fatigue and urmmm….ask-your-wife-to-come-to-bed-after-five-minutes look. Well, every August, the Bukusu sub-tribe of the Luhya community features in various local and international media with their very cringe-worthy circumcision ceremony.

Once they had the screaming, wailing girl on their shoulders, with the broken pot the only evidence that her now-Sherlock Homes father had to go on, the abductor carried her home and raped her as an attempt to get her pregnant. Kenya - Kenya - Education: The national educational system consists of three levels: eight years of compulsory primary education (beginning at age six), four years at the secondary level, and four years of higher education. If you research on Wife abduction, you will get the idea that it is unique to parts of Rwanda and West Africa that have men strong enough to hold down a wailing and screaming girl (Considered a standard practice at the time, no cause for alarm, just a girl getting married). Various ethnic communities speak their respective local dialects, though the country has adopted Swahili as the national language and English as the official language of instruction. To their credit, this was long before HIV/AIDs, most STIs and before the whole hullabaloo of monogamy and of course, The raised hut in the middle is not where they kept the condoms, its the granary…  So, the man with over 60 wives started visiting a lot, and we all know that there is nothing as annoying as being visited by the most important man on that side of the mountain.

Beside them are women deep-frying fish or chips. It probably means that the largest tribe in Kenya was initially made up of people who believed that beating was…urrrmmm, a sign of love (forget flowers ladies, this is where erotic punishments begun). Okay, I just wanted you to wonder what the Bukusu traditions have to do with Mango the Fruit. Not only does it have cannibalistic connotations to it, it still manages to do so with a sexual element, not sexist, sexual.It is the proverb upon which wife inheritance is built, the idea that women are clan property and must therefore   If you think this culture is fading away fast, think again because it is integrated in the very semantics of Dholuo.

East African Arts Festival They usually live in … I then bring him some warm tea and that night, I get my thingMore proof that the people who made customs liked to mess with women…If you can read or speak Dholuo then you know what the proverb above means.

Next to these are beef smokies stands.

It’s simply translates toDo you get how graphic that is? Anyway, I am sure you know that each country struggles to market its tribes and their traditions without putting the word bizarre after such events.Its hard, however, not to scream BIZARRE! WEIRD! Disable your Facebook notifications, close the site with the dirty videos, and discover the 17 facts you absolutely need to know before dating beautiful Kenyan women. It is an open secret that the fear of all men is having their genitalia (not   I appreciate the female form and feel that most straight men do not recognize that FGM affects them too.

The Kenyan culture is a unique blend of African traditions and modern 20th century influences. The vast majority of the population is Christian, so the major religious Kenya holidays of Easter and Christmas are also public holidays.

It is customary to offer guests Kenyan events are not RSVP’d in most cases – RSVP is a very recent and acquired habit by the middle class.

One was expected to show similar hospitality if the current host visited, and they frequently did and you could deny them the chance. Did I mention that, as in many other African cultures, those who have previously undergone the ritual are allowed to bully the candidate as a way of ‘hardening’ him? Sorry, your blog cannot share posts by email. Oh, and you’re also going to learn what a mzungu is, why you are one, and why this increases your chances to charm single women from Kenya by 519% (yep, that’s the exact number).. and no one was allowed by custom to intervene if they witnessed such an act so your girls could technically go on to fetch water as you were carried to some guys home, your ‘market value’ decreasing with every step he took towards the homestead. During the Christmas season, they travel to the coastal region giving rise to the phrase “Nyama choma served with kienyeji and veggies | © Xiaojun Deng / Flickr I doubt any spirit is going to wait that long for people to get their groove on.

According to five Bukusu rites, a complete ritual must have kamalwa, short form for lots of booze, bling bling (the candidate must wear a bull’s brisket), disco (commonly known as likhoni and then when the DJ deems it fit, khuminya-the ultimate circumcision dance), nude dipping (sadly, no women are allowed close to the river) and sikhebo. It was sort of a sampling mission and the best part is, he could use the same route with the same stopovers on the way back and not fear his host would hide his wife at the back of the fridge (we all do it once in a while, that last beer, that last can soda, that last piece of pizza, that gorgeous teenage daughter)Wife swap is actually African huh, makes you wonder whether there was group sex too that was, urmmm, never documented (lack of cameras, and of course, free hands to record)…   I know, there is little that is funny about death itself to the self-righteous but if you analyzed the burial customs of most Kenyan tribes, the word bizarre does not even begin to describe the superstitions that went into burying the dead.



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